CHILDREN OF DESTINY

Exodus 2:1-2

Different researches on the effect upbringing has on the life of an individual have shown that poverty and family background have a major impact on the lives of individuals and that the social status of parents influence the way the children are raised.


In his book, Outliers, Malcolm Gladwell relates the story of a research carried out by a professor of psychology, Lewis Terman in 1921, on 250,000 children out of which he selected 1, 470 children who he considered to have the highest IQ levels. He spent decades observing them, and by the time they became adults, he gathered information on 730 of them.

He noticed that not all of the children fared well. The most significant outcome of his research was that all the kids who did well came from middle - income/rich families, and those who didn't fare well came from poor families. Therefore, he concluded that, it's the status of an individual's family, and not IQ levels, that made the greatest impact on the outcome of that individual.


Another researcher, Annette Lareau, an educational sociologist, focused on parenting in the USA. She believed that the temperaments of parents made the difference in their style of parenting. Together with her team, they studied families of different races and social status by participating in their everyday lives.

They noticed the difference between the way parents who belonged to the middle-income/rich class and the way parents from the low-income/poor class raised their children. The middle-income/rich parents raised their children to be bold, confident and to participate in extra-curricular activities in school.

The low-income/poor parents on the other hand did not do much to boost their children self-confidence. Their children invented games in the neighborhood. Their conclusion, therefore, was that it is class and not race that has a greater impact on the development and outcome of the life of a child.


In Nigeria, our concept of leadership which encourages the cliche that "children should be seen and not heard", has negatively affected the children and they are growing without self-esteem not the confidence to speak boldly. Also, the prevalent poverty is not helping matters.


The following tips will help:


SALVATION AND SPIRITUAL DEVELOPMENT - Children must, as a matter of urgency, be led to Christ, in order to get a healthy identity in God.

EDUCATION - Parents must make sacrifices to send their children to school. The church also must contribute.

COMMUNITY - We should be good mentors for children, expose them to the correct type of association, and give the less privileged the opportunity to develop in the right atmosphere...Pastor Sam Adeyemi

Marriage is a Covenant

A covenant is an agreement between two or more people. There are different types of covenants – blood, peace covenants. A blood covenant is the highest form of agreement to God and man.

Marriage falls under the category of a blood covenant, that is why a girl must marry as a virgin because on the first day of sexual intercourse, a covenant is cut with the shedding of blood when the hymen is broken. Interestingly, marriage is a covenant between three – man, woman and God.

Marriage nowadays, is a caricature of what God designed. The rate of separation and divorce, even in church, is at an all time high. People get divorced for mundane reasons e.g. cooking, snoring, physical appearance etc.

This is because human beings are always innovating, designing and changing systems in pursuit of utopia. In Matthew 19.3-10, when Jesus was questioned about divorce, He explained that divorce was never God’s original plan, Moses permitted the people to divorce, he gave this adjustment to suit the hardness of their hearts. Marriage is a covenant that MUST NOT be broken. We should not bend God’s rules to suit ourselves. Sexual intercourse should be exclusive to marriage only.

Apart from physical activity, sex is an interaction of spirits, therefore every human being is designed to have sex with one person for a life time. To do otherwise is to break the covenant and breaking covenants brings on curses. Marriage amplifies our fears and insecurities.

The challenge for us is to develop character to keep our marital vows in the face of adversity. The first thing to do is acceptance, we must accept and love ourselves unconditionally and be willing to give and forgive. Let’s always remember to ask God for help when we are weak. God’s word stands forever, He will not vary His standards to suit our whims and caprices. It’s important to take the time to search the scriptures and understand our responsibilities towards God regarding marriage.

A final word for the singles – begin to test your capacity for integrity before considering marriage. Do not overlook critical warning signals before getting married. A little adjustment in our thinking will make a world of difference for “as a man thinketh...” Pastor Sam Adeyemi